T.Huge Esq.
Born in the desert to a nomadic tribe of berber bedouin on
Sept. 3 2005. Since then he has developed the art of dual-wield
light saber battle to unparalleled heights. Mr. Huge was last seen
wandering the fringes of Black Rock City in search of lost pharmaceuticals.
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The Guv'nor.
Hatched from a deviled egg on a paisley tablecloth in a
victorian chicken hut, The Guv'nor rose from humble beginnings to
eventually graduate magnum cum opus from the Derelict School Of
Misbegotten Poultry Engineering. Today he galavants across galactic
planes commanding a marauding horde of ruffled miscreants,dubiously
searching for the next lascivious libation.
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Eric.
The Protector of the Dodo, utilizing props when necessary,
patiently awaiting it's return when it disappears and not
only navigating dust storms and unruly passengers but also
painstakingly keeping track of his chemically enhanced friends.
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Dr. Disaster Ph.D.
Once a prominent London phrenologist, his credentials were
revoked by the board amidst accusations of necrophilia and
organ harvesting. Before joining the crew he lived in squalor
on income from donating his copious sperm.
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Wendy.
Outcast and shunned by her Mennonite sect after the pastor's
jealous wife claimed that she was a changeling and her birthmark
a demonic sigil. Learning the truth of these accusations
during a seance, she embraced her nature and moved to
nantucket, harpooning whales.
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Briana.
The scion of an ancient gypsy clan, she was introduced to
polite society after her triumphant performance as Lady
MacBeth at the Globe. Though few noticed the concurrent theft
of Lady Woadmire's tiara, John Singer Sargeant's portrait of
her made a sensation at the Paris Salon.
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Leyla.
Found as a baby wrapped in sail-canvas near the
Wentworth docks, she absconded from St. James'
orphanage at the age of seven. Her childhood was
spent passing as a powder-monkey and cabin boy.
Though the men of crew are loath to admit it,
she knows as much of the Ineptus as anyone.
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Nebula Montana.
The only surviving member of the once powerful
Abersham on Glenfargoth coven, she bides her time
as the Ineptus' figurehead, waiting
till the day her enemies' vigilance slips and she
can collect their hearts and livers for her stew.
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D.J. Bard.
"The Thorned Rose of Somerset". Since escaping bonded
servitude to a one-eyed carnival magician she has
specialized in bank jobs. Although she has never killed,
her ability to reload and hand over pistols extremely
quickly while under fire makes her a valued drinking companion.
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Emilie.
The bored daughter of a respectable banking family.
Once the muse for an artists' collective in Taos NM.
She has since found the inner peace that eluded her
there in contemplating the pleas of her numerous victims.
She is worshipped as an avatar of Kali by a sect of
Bangalore mystics.
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Zeus.
Lately in the import trade.
His numerous liaisons across all levels of society
provoked much sanctimony and not a little prurient envy.
Whether he crews with the Ineptus because
her voyages are ideal to feed his proclivities or
if he is simply fleeing London scandals he is a trusted
navigator.
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Hoops
His penchant for mixing Rum and firearms have recently consigned
him to the kitchen as a result of the ill-fated wake occasioned
by his beloved parrot's death from cirrhosis of the liver.
"Dinnae shoot tha man unless yar ready t' take 'is job..."
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NRG and Sailorboy.
Their fame was assured when they partied an entire favella
to destruction during the infamous Rio carnival of 2003.
Showing no signs of slowing down, it is imperative they
be kept away from strong spirits while on-board.
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Rich DDT.
Thought to have been decanted sometime in the 26th century,
an accident in the Nexus left him unstuck in time. Although
his rank in hidden, evidence suggests that he is at least a
Viscount in the Peerage of Time.
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